The Daylight Savings Time of Aging – A sampling of “Boomer Haiku and More Random Silliness”

imagesAging. If we could only have Aging Savings Time. Oh – I forgot-it’s called Botox and

plastic surgery. Nevertheless, it would be so nice if we could just keep the acquired wisdom of

the advancing years and stop the physical clock. However, if that happened, then there wouldn’t

be many aging jokes!

 

Single Boomer’s Daughter:  “OMG – I think Fred wants a commitment!”

Daughter’s Friend:  “How do you know?”

Single Boomer’s Daughter:  “He gave me the passcode to his IPhone!”

Single Boomer:  “Oh my goodness Betty, I think Bob is committed to me!”

Single Boomer’s Friend:  “How do you know?”

Single Boomer:  “He put me as a beneficiary on his retirement!”

 

I feel like fasting

Saw myself naked today

When did this happen?

Yoga Teacher:  “Now change your position to downward dog.”

Boomer Student:  “I think my dog just pooped in his pants.”

Yoga Teacher:  “Take your downward dog, lower yourself to a plank position.”

Boomer Student:  “I’d like to make you walk a plank.”

Yoga Teacher: “Back to downward dog.”

Boomer Student:  “My dog was neutered fifteen years ago, but still has its ovaries.”

Yoga Teacher:  “Rest in child’s pose.”

Boomer Student: “How about crying bones pose?”

 

Father Time has nowFermenting PicBookCoverImage

Begun to catch up with that

Bitch Mother Nature

Alaska Resident:  “Was that an earthquake?”

Alaskan Boomer:  “I think it was the lentil soup I ate last night.”

Tokyo Resident:  “Was that an earthquake?”

Tokyo Boomer:  “I think it was the pork shogayaki I had last night.”

Chili Resident: “Was that an earthquake?”

Chili Boomer:  “It was the spicy fruit salsa I had last night.”

Alaskan Boomer: “Anyone have an antacid?”

Alaskan Resident: “It’s called youth.”

When I work out I

really don’t tone my body

I harden my fat

Yes, this blog is an advertisement for my new gift book. I’m the author of “Laughing in the Rain – Self Care for the Storms of Life” and the new “Boomer Haiku, and More Random Silliness.”  It seems that as I age, I am also more bold about shameless promotion!

Be Sociable, Share!
Post Tagged with , , ,
Latest Blog Post Latest Tweets Tags:
  • Conflicted Karaoke
  • A Senior Olympic Inspiration Despite the Truth of My Current Baby Boomer Athletic Status
  • The Daylight Savings Time of Aging – A sampling of “Boomer Haiku and More Random Silliness”
  • The Holiday Potluck
  • The Horticulture Lottery
  • Fish on!
  • Oh, Go Take a Hike! (I Actually Did!)
  • The Voice – A Tribute to Big Mitch
  • Weathering In Like a Lion, Out Like an Indecisive Lamb
  • The Lindsey Lohan Reality Show
  • New Year’s Resolutions
  • nature fishing pot reality shows contests karaoke lice pinkeye salmon family dinners singing elvis social hiking journal New Year's Resolutions parenting stress winter marketing parenting humor relationships hair family stress microphones technology Haiku exercise parenting baby boomers success joints head rolls seniors humor prayer Poetry olympic games potluck Millers Riverboat Service weather Christmas holiday stress fall blog Britain's Got Talent Guilt mentor holiday stress ballot measure #2 breakups anxiety summer signs of stress food parenting martyrs teacher Thanksgiving dinner stress relationship humor cannabis tribute Lindsey Lohan Susan Boyle Charlo Greene spring social media holiday Boomer marijuana outside holidays